Confessions of the Formerly Habitually Late

My name is Michelle and I have a problem. No, I'm not a alcoholic, I'm habitually late. I've always been late for as long as I can remember. This problem bothered me some, mostly I was bothered by the consequences of being late to important events. Mainly I accepted it as a personality flaw and went about my life. You can't change who you are, right?

Last year in writing my goals, I set a personal goal to be more on time during 2011. And guess what some amazing things happened. Not only have I made some great improvements in this area. I now often show up early to meetings or events. There is nothing that makes a person who has been habitually late more happy than to be the first person to show up to a meeting or event. In the past 6 months I've often been the first one to show up to meetings with friends or events. Just this week hubby and I were the first ones to show up to the hospital tour and even beat the instructor there. Once it was 3-4 minutes before and none of the other 6 couples or instructor were there I even began to wonder if we were in the right place. Waiting for other people who are late doesn't bother me in fact it makes me happy to be the first one there. Each time is a tiny triumph for this formerly habitually late person.

So what have I been doing differently? There still aren't enough hours in the day. I still want to try to finish one last thing before I leave. I still underestimate how long it takes me to finish that one last thing. I also still underestimate how long it takes me to get places. The biggest thing I've changed in the past year is building in a time "buffer". If I think it will take me 15 minutes to get somewhere I plan to leave 30 minutes before. This way if I leave 5 minutes late and hit 5 minutes of traffic, I'll still be a few minutes early. If I think it will take me an hour to get ready for something I give myself an hour and half. It has been working great for me. Every time I have somewhere to be I add some extra time onto my leaving time and have been really successful at not being late. Sometimes I'm right on time or a few minutes early, sometimes I'm 10 minutes or more early, and sometimes I'm still late but the improvement for me personally has been amazing.

Giving myself more time to get places and get ready has really lowered my stress level. Since I was habitually late I didn't stress about it too much since it was my way of life. Now that I am on time or early 8/10 times I realize how much less stressful being early or on time is. Hubby generally runs on time so I think being more on time has made him happier too.

You too can recover from your habitual lateness. It just takes some extra planning and thought on your part and a desire to make being on time a priority. I'm not perfect but I love the improvements I've made and continue to delight on each on time or early arrival I make. Next time we meet for coffee, don't worry I'll be there 5 minutes early and silently delighting in my little triumph.

27 Week Update

I can't believe I haven't updated since 20 weeks! Here are some of my pregnancy photos from this last week.

 The 26 week belly, 1-29-2012

26 week profile shot, 1-29-2012

Due date: May 4, 2012


How far along: 27 weeks


Maternity clothes: Ha! With a belly like that it has to be maternity. The shirt in the photo is a size small maternity top and it isn't going to fit another 3 months.


Baby bump: This last week I definitely "popped" again. Between 26-27 weeks I started to feel huge and there is no question I have a big baby bump. I can't even imagine how much bigger it will get in the next 3 months. Hubby and I were looking at Brennan's baby book and I'm about the same size as I was at 35 weeks with Brennan.

Gender: We aren't going to find out the gender. We are really excited to announce both the gender and the name once the baby is born.


Heartbeat: The baby is getting bigger and their heart rate has slowed a bit. At my 26 week appointment it was 145-150 depending upon if the baby was moving or not. This last time the baby didn't want to stay still and let the midwife get a good heart rate.


Movement: I do have an anterior placenta which was confirmed at my ultrasound. I don't feel as much movement as people generally feel at this stage of pregnancy. I do feel at least 10 spontaneous movements throughout the day but rarely feel more than 1 kick or punch in a row. Yesterday the baby was extremely active and moving all over the place so maybe the baby is finally getting big enough that I can feel the movements despite the placement of my placenta. This past week I've definitely gotten some rib jabs and punches to the cervix. I've haven't felt the baby get hiccups yet but I know that is coming too.


Symptoms: Overall I still feel great and honestly feel really blessed to have avoided terrible morning sickness in both my pregnancies. I have been sleeping better these past few weeks. We started our Hypnobabies childbirth preparation and I think that has really helped me to relax and sleep better since we do our practice before bed. I'll write a separate post about why we chose Hypnobabies and what our experience with it has been so far. My back is starting to hurt, especially at the end of the day or if I have to do any extended periods of sitting. 

Tests and midwife appointment updates: Baby was back to measuring right on track after measuring 2 weeks ahead at my 22 week appointment and 5 days ahead at my ultrasound. I guess the baby must have just been in the middle of a growth spurt around 22 weeks. At 26 weeks I had my gestational diabetes screen which I passed with flying colors. The solution wasn't as bad as I remembered it though I did request lemon lime and drank it ice cold. At my 26 week appointment there was a moderate amount of protein in my urine as well as trace amounts of white blood cells. Due to my first trimester high blood pressure this warranted further testing. My midwife explained that there was a note in my chart to due the testing at 28 weeks due to my first trimester high blood pressure and that due to the protein it was safer to do it now rather than wait two weeks. My blood pressure was still 116/74 so at least that was good. in order to officially have pre-eclampsia you have to have both high protein levels (mine were moderate) and high blood pressure (mine was still normal). I had to do a 24 hour urine screen and a metabolic panel, both pre-eclampsia tests, to make sure that wasn't beginning to develop. I was stressing out over the weekend about the tests and the possibility of developing pre-eclampsia this early in my pregnancy since the only cure is delivery of the baby. I ended up getting several bad headaches but was able to determine they were sinus (and probably stress too) related. I completed the test Sunday since I had to essentially be home for 24 hours straight which rarely happens. Monday afternoon I heard back from the midwife and got some decent news. First my blood test results were all great and someone developing or who has pre-eclampsia should have markers in their blood to indicate that as well. My protein results were only ok. A normal result would be 50-70, mine was 168, but the 24 hr protein level has to be 300 or greater to be considered pre-eclampsia. My midwife said I would have to repeat the 24 hour urine screen and blood work at 28 weeks but to not worry and carry on like normal until then. She said it is possible with my Crohn's and medication I take that my baseline protein number is just simply higher. I'm slightly unsure about that because according to the in office screen at 8, 10, and 14 weeks I didn't have an protein in my urine (I transferred care at 14 weeks and this midwife practice doesn't routinely screen your urine in office until 26 weeks). Reading online there is a small possibility that a UTI can cause protein or white blood cells to show up in your urine. It doesn't seem like the likely cause but I am going to ask at my next appointment whether my urine was tested for a UTI and if not request it is before we do another 24 hour urine screen. Send prayers and good thoughts my way that this is just normal for my body and not the beginning of pre-eclampsia. Also in monitoring my blood pressure at home this week it has been slightly higher but staying under 130/85. My midwife did not seem concerned about this at all since she said they said now that I'm in the 3rd trimester that they expect my blood pressure to return to 1st trimester levels which for me were high. Every pregnant woman has lower blood pressure during the 2nd trimester due to hormonal changes in pregnancy. 

Exercise: I'm doing much better with exercise! I love my prenatal water aerobics class. It is great to have 2 days per week with a full hour of physical activity. It is nice to get out of the house and spend time with other pregnant women. My first session ended and I just started a 2nd session this week. We've also had several days  of weather in the 40's and 50's and the kids and I have been going for walks of about 2 miles or so. Between the walking and water aerobics I am getting 4-5 days of exercise which makes me happy. The water aerobics class isn't very strenuous but it is still a full hour of physical activity so I'll take it.

Next Appointment: I'm in the third trimester now so I have appointments every 2 weeks. My next appointment is on Friday, February 10th. Last appointment was the first pregnancy related thing hubby couldn't make it to. Now that my appointments are more frequent I am going to schedule them for Friday mornings because it is hard for him to get out of work at 3:30pm and then we have the problem of who is going to watch the kids. He's met a few of the midwives and I'll make sure at the end of the pregnancy when I schedule appointments with midwives he hasn't met to make the appointments for when he can go.

Here is the link to the Baby Center Your Pregnancy: 27 weeks . Some of the highlights: your baby weighs about 2 pounds now (size of a head of cauliflower) and is about 14 1/2 inches long with her legs extended. She's sleeping at regular intervals and waking at regular intervals and opening and closing her eyes and perhaps even sucking her thumb. Your baby's brain is very active. While her lungs are capable of functioning outside the womb with a lot of medical help they are still immature. Hiccups are common for babies at this point in pregnancy. At this point in pregnancy back pain and leg cramps are common.

Scientists Abound!

Last week was a busy week for our family. Wynter participated in the all subjects fair at her school and Brennan participated in an inventor's fair for district middle school students hosted by a local company.

Wynter's school hosts an all subjects fair instead of a science fair. The idea is the same as the science fair but students were not limited to only science topics to research. Wynter's project was titled, "Healthy Life" and focused on a healthy diet and exercise. It was neat that she chose to study healthy diet and exercise all on her own. I think she learned a few things and having to manage an 8 week long project with interim guidelines, a paper, and a presentation is a great skill to have.

Wynter's Healthy Life project

For Brennan's inventor's fair he could invent anything that didn't exist or make significant improvements to an existing product, similar to the guidelines for obtaining a patent. The company that hosted the inventor's fair was Wasson-ECE Instrumentation and they were very gracious hosts. They definitely encouraged the invention process within the kids. Each invention was judged and the students had to defend and discuss their inventions with the judges. The company provided plenty of snacks during the morning and while the judging results were tallied we were taken on a tour of their facility. While the entry materials said the top 20 inventions would receive $100 cash prize, all 32 entries received $100 cash. The top 3 inventions also received an opportunity to shadow one of the engineers at the company for 1/2 day.

Brennan's invention was a solar powered light built into a nook cover. He has a Nook Simple Touch which is not backlight so he can't read in the dark. He likes reading in bed and doesn't have a bedside lamp and also likes reading in the car. Since it gets dark so early often our car trips are in the dark too. He wanted a case with a light built in but when he searched for one he couldn't find it. Making it solar powered was just an added bonus so you never have to plug it in. After some research and discussions with my hubby, who thank goodness is a mechanical engineer himself, Brennan designed and built the case and solar powered light himself. It turned out great and he was super excited to receive the $100 cash prize!

His invention was called Solstice

Close up of invention and backboard

Certificate of completion and $100

Happy 9th Birthday Phoenix!

Happy 9th birthday Phoenix! You are such a joy to our family. You are smart and witty and cute and petite. You'll only be the baby of the family for a few more months so enjoy it but then you'll even have a more important role, big sister. I can't wait to watch you flourish and grow as a big sister. I'm proud of the young lady you are becoming. You definitely are not a baby anymore. Keep up the good work. We love you!

Baby Phoenix on the right

Phoenix's 1st day of kindergarten

My beautiful ballerina, 2010

July 2011

The birthday table all set for the birthday girl

The birthday girl on her way to school this morning

2012 Goals

Last year writing out my goals on my blog and updating on my progress throughout the year helped keep me accountable so for 2012 I'm doing the same. Some are personal goals, some are financial goals, some are fitness goals, and some are family goals.


1. Be more patient with my children. Generally speaking I am a relatively patient person but I know I could grow in this area this year. Honestly now that my kids are older my expectations for them are high and I get frustrated when they do things like ignore me over and over again or fight non-stop with each other. These and other behaviors are not acceptable but my response needs to be more patient and I need to institute appropriate consequences for the misbehavior, and not lose my temper or yell. I think this is a very important goal for me this year with the new baby coming in May.


2. Spend more quality time with my husband, go on dates more, and make it a priority to spend at least two weekends with him this year completely kid-free. Last week we had a nice treat, 24 hours kid-free. I can't even describe how it refreshed my soul. Hubby and I had a wonderful date and lots of time to just be a couple and take a break from parenting. We got about halfway through The Love Dare book last year and we need to make it a priority to finish it over the next couple months. I'd also love to get involved with a small group or marriage study at church if there is one available that fits our schedule.


3. Make more local friends. Spend more time with my long time friends. I'm a people person, plain and simple. People feed my soul and I need that interaction with friends on a regular basis. I'd love to meet more local women to get together with regularly. I'd also love to get together more regularly with my long time girlfriends who I love spending time with but most live 45 minutes away or so. A little progress in both regards this year would make me happy.


4. Learn more about parenting tweens and teens. I feel very unprepared for the challenges that lay ahead now that I have an 11, 11, and almost 9 year old. Babies, toddler, preschoolers, I'm an expert at, but teens they are almost alien like creatures. Luckily none of my kids have gotten to the stage where they "hate" me and think everything I do is wrong. Both 11 year olds have attitudes though drastically different due to gender and personality. The 9 year still hasn't hit the attitude, pre-teen stage yet but I told hubby we've got 1 more good year out of her at most before it starts with her too.


5. Stick to a budget! I am awful at this. I make a budget, I'm frugal, yet we still overspend. It is vicious cycle. Life with three kids isn't cheap but we should be saving and paying off debt quicker than we are. My number one financial goal this year is to stick to a budget. Nate is now helping more with the finances instead of all of it resting on my shoulders and we implemented a new system to track the budget this year so I am hoping it works.


6. Find little ways to cut back on spending. Cut grocery bill down even more, restart The Grocery Game, 2nd hand shop for the kids as much as possible (in 2011 I had great luck with consignment sales and a local consignment shop), cut back on eating out, and any other little way I can figure out. It may only total up to $100-$200 per month but if that can be paid towards student loans and less interest the impact is magnified.


7. Fully fund a 6 month emergency fund, then start paying down student loans. We're having a baby in May. We have a lot of large expenses the first half of this year, $3000 deductible and co-insurance for delivery, a new car that seats 6, finishing a bedroom in the basement for Brennan, and re-decorating Phoenix's old room for the baby. These things are going to take a lot of our extra income for the first 6 months of the year, not to mention everything the baby needs like furniture, gear, clothes, etc. Being realistic my goal would be to have our 6 month emergency fund fully funded by the end of April. Given the expenses we have coming up this year, after our emergency fund is fully funded my goal for our student loans would be to pay $10,000 towards student loans by the end of 2012. That isn't much at all considering the huge amount of student loans hubby and I have but it would be a start in the right direction. I think that amount could at least pay off both of our private student loans and leave us both with only Federal Stafford loans which have low interest rates and the most flexible repayment terms.


8. Get back into running. I was running until about 13-14 weeks pregnant but then it got cold here in Colorado and I can't seem to get the motivation back. I was really hoping to keep running my entire pregnancy and run a fall 2012 half marathon but that goal may be too big for this year. Plus the half marathon I wanted to run is now when we'll be out of town in September. Running a summer 5K and a fall 10K and training well for them are probably better postpartum goals. This will leave me ready to train for a spring 2013 half marathon and the Colorado Marathon is my first choice. It will also leave me very well trained to run a fast (for me) 2013 Bolder Boulder. Running the Bolder Boulder has been my dream since I got into running but this year I'll only be a couple weeks postpartum so it will have to be delayed until 2013.

So those are my goals for 2012. Thanks for helping keep me accountable!

Introducing Baby Brown

The baby's first photos! We had our first and likely only ultrasound on Tuesday. It was the 20 week anatomy scan though we waited until I was 22 weeks 4 days so it would be in the 2012 plan year for our insurance deductible.

It was so amazing to see the baby. My favorite part was the tech got an up close shot of the baby's little lips and nose, and they looked just adorable. The tech said everything looked great and got all the measurements we needed. We left there with about 15 profile photos of the baby and a live action DVD of the whole thing. Technology has definitely improved over the past 12 years since I've been pregnant!

We also got a call from our midwife yesterday going over the ultrasound report and she said everything looked perfect. We have a healthy baby growing in there! I wasn't worried something was wrong but hearing those words, "your baby looks perfect" sure felt great.

At my 22 week appointment I was measuring 24 weeks or 2 weeks ahead according to fundal height. At the ultrasound the baby was 1 pound 4 oz and measuring 5 days ahead. Since we're past the first trimester and babies grow at all different rates according to their genetics they will not adjust my due date but I'll likely have a bigger than average baby. Brennan was 8 lbs 1oz and I was 8lbs 12oz and hubby is 6'0" tall and 180 pounds so I wasn't expecting a small baby to start with. We were just happy to hear everything looks great and get a sneak peek at the baby. The day was even more special because hubby and the kids all got to be there to see the baby too. I can't believe the baby will be here in a little under 4 months!

Mommy and baby photos

Side view

The frame for our dresser

Baby

Love this profile shot!

A One Day Can Change the Course of the Rest of Your Life

6 years ago today, despite hubby going to the wrong Starbucks (there is one on every corner in Colorado) hubby and I had our first date. It is amazing how something so simple can truly change the course of the rest of your life. We had met on Match.com and had a few long phone conversations but had never met in person. If I hadn't realized he was at a different Starbucks we both would've probably thought we were stood up and moved on in our dating adventure. Lucky for both of us that isn't how things turned out. Our first date was wonderful and we spent hours sitting in Starbucks talking and laughing. The rest is pretty much history but 13 months later we were engaged and 2 1/2 years after our first date we were married. Now 6 years later we've been married 3 1/2 years and are expecting our first "together" baby.

I love you so much Nate and thank God each day for bringing you into my life. You are a wonderful husband, father, provider, companion, and my best friend. I can't wait to see what 2012 has in store for us with the arrival of our new baby and all the excitement that brings. Here's to 6 more and 60 more years of happiness together! I love you!

If you want to read more about our love story I wrote about it here.

Then

Now