Tuesday, February 3, 2009

What to do when kids lie?

FiFi is going through this lying phase. I don't mean the occasional fib here or there but the I got caught in the act, will look you right in the eye, and lie to your face, at least once sometimes twice a day phase. This phase also includes hiding things, being sneaky, and otherwise deceptive. So far this phase has been going on for a few months with reprieves of normal behavior in between.

Currently we are in a two week all out lying phase and mom is not sure how to get through to her. I know B went through this at a similar age as well as other challenging phase such as the terrible twos starting at 1 1/2 phase, the biting non-stop from 1 1/2-2 years old phase, etc. I know all these phases pass and all kids have them even if not the same phases. I cannot for the life of me remember what I did when B was in his lying phase or if it worked. It has been probably 4-5 years ago at this point and my memory just isn't that good.

So if anyone has gone through this and has any wonderful suggestions please let me know. If you just want to encourage me that I am not the only parent dealing with these type of things that would be wonderful too!

So far we have tried taking away privileges such as TV, DS, computer, etc., time-outs (quiet time alone in her room), and positive reinforcement (sticker chart) but she just cheated on the sticker chart to try to get the reward instead of it helping her to be honest.

Thanks! You ladies are great!


Gina said...

A friend of mine gave me this gem for kids who lie...tell her you are going to her favorite place, restaurant, whatever. Then drive somewhere totally different and say, "See how it hurts when you lie?"

That's all I've got. Good luck!

Evolving Mommy Catherine said...

I've got nothing, but I am interested to hear what other moms say because I might go through this someday.

Anonymous said...

okay, I was gonna post about how I took several child psychology classes in college and blah blah blah but I just read Gina's comment and now I have to go make her my new best friend cuz damn, that is gooooood!

I'm a Mom!..? said...

I'm laughing so hard right now about the cheating on the sticker chart and lying about the restaurant.

We are kind of a the tail end of this right now. I'm not really much help, we just remained consistent and firm. We explained right and wrong, bad decisions and good decisions, blah blah, but in the end, I think all kids are going to do this, I really feel it's a testing issue, as much as it is a learning issue for them.

Hang in there!! This too shall pass.