Each Relationship Between Two Persons is Absolutely Unique. That is Why You Cannot Love Two People the Same.

I just finished reading "The Shack" by WM. Paul Young. It was very thought provoking to say the least. As a Christian is throws all your ideas about who God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are out the window. Not in a I don't believe in God way, but a why does God have to be depicted as a white male sort of way? God doesn't let evil happen but instead wishes to preserve free will, sort of way. Very thought provoking and a great read that I would highly recommend.



As a parent and more specifically as a step-parent a certain part of the book hit home with me. I don't often refer to myself as a step-parent. All three of our kids live with my husband and myself full-time with almost no contact from their other biological parent. I may not have given birth to these two girls but they are my kids.



On page 215 is the following part:

"Each relationship between two persons is absolutely unique. That is why you cannot love two people the same. It is simply is not possible. You love each person differently because of who they are and the uniqueness that they draw out of you. And the more you know another, the richer...that relationship."



This hit home with me. When I was pregnant with B I fell madly in love with this baby growing inside me. I loved him more than anything in this world and my love for him has only grown. My job as his mommy was not only to love him but to nurture and protect him.



Then I met my husband. I love him differently and I got that. I not only had a deep love for him that has grown over time but a romantic love for him. I don't love him because I have known him my whole life but I am in love with hubby and he is my best friend. A very different kind of love than what I feel for B but equally strong and I understand why. B was my child but hubby was both my partner in life and best friend.



Now here come the complicated part. I have always felt like it was wrong for me to have a different love for FiFi, and a different love for Wyn. I don't love the two of them the same, of course not, they are very different people, and I don't love them the same as B or the same as hubby. I don't love them more or less but differently. I always thought there was something wrong with this, something wrong with me, but now I am beginning to realize this is what all parents feel. "You cannot love two people the same."



So mamas of more than one please tell me I am not crazy. Please tell me you love each of your children not more or less but differently, because of their unique personality, and this is the God given way it is supposed to be. While reading this book I seriously had an "aha" moment.

Books Are Like Crack

Seriously, I am addicted to books, fiction, non-fiction, suspense, love stories, I can't get enough! I haven't done many book reviews on my blog except rambling about my love of the Twilight series but I have been so into reading lately that I figured I should share this part of my life with you as well.

One of my favorite authors is James Patterson. I do have a bit of a love, hate relationship with Mr. Patterson. His books are scary! Like the give you nightmares before bed scary but I can't get enough of them. They are full of suspense and twists and turns and one of the best parts is they are full of short chapters leaving a busy mom lots of stopping points. He also tells his stories from many of the characters points of view. So one moment you are reading the story from the detectives point of view and the next chapter you may be reading the story from the murders point of view.

I have read two of his books featuring Alex Cross, Mary Mary and Double Cross. Both really good books, both really suspenseful, both really scary. I also read Beach Road not quite as good but lots of twists and turns and an ending that totally shocked me. All three are good books.

Thanks to my BFF who also likes to read I am completely hooked on the Woman's Murder Club Series of books by James Patterson. They all have cute titles that include the number of the book like 1st to Die, 2nd Chance, and 3rd Degree. I just picked up 4th of July and can't wait to get started. All three of them are great books and they third one completely shocked me when one of the characters died. James Patterson is also really good at incorporating current events into his novel. 3rd Degree is set at the San Francisco G-8 meeting where college level protests give way to terrorism and murder. Crazy to think of but things like this can and do happen.

So if you are not faint of heart and can handle some suspense and an occasional gruesome description (you know the kind of person who watches 48 Mystery on TV) then James Patterson is the author for you. You will not be disappointed! If you have not read any of his books I would recommend the Woman's Murder Club Series, starting with 1st to Die. Since his books are so popular our local library has numerous copies of each one so worst case scenario I wait a couple days for it to be sent from the other branch. Win-win for everyone. I get a great book and it doesn't cost me a dime.