Being a parent is a tough job. I wish I could back to the days when I worried about when to start solids or if I was doing this potty training thing right. I've worked with babies and toddlers and preschoolers my whole life. I get them! Even after a horrible tantrum they are so stinking cute and you chalk most it up to their age and move on.
But big kids like my school age children are hard! I spend a lot of time second guessing myself. I get frustrated when the kids don't listen, when they are naughty, when they are irresponsible. While I love my children more than anything on this earth and consider each one my friend, I feel strongly that my job as parent is not to be their friend but to love them and set guidelines to help them succeed. I am to love, nurture, and support them, yet teach them responsibility, humility, and compassion, as well as that every choice has natural consequences.
Really what it comes down to is I have a short time with my kids and in that time I have to teach them to be responsible adults that can function in society.
Sometimes I think I am too hard, nothing is ever good enough, but I am often complimented on my children's manners and good behavior. To me it feels like chaos more often than not. If I was much more relaxed it would be complete chaos all the time.
Last night Wyn got caught lying. Not just any lie but she watched her sister get in trouble for her bad deed. This blows me away, that my children don't have the integrity to not lie in the first place, but that they will sit back and let someone else take their punishment.
We drilled FiFi about the deed after all three children swore they did not do it. I can read B pretty well and after some initial discussion was pretty sure it was not him. Wyn never lies so I really did not think it was her. Besides her tantrums, pouting, and attitude she rarely gets in trouble.
FiFi on the other hand is in the middle of a lying phase. She is 6 and get caught lying on a somewhat regular basis. FiFi is always punished for lying more severely than if she would've told the truth to start with. I remember B going through a phase of lying around 4 or 5 so I keep hoping it passes quickly.
After the truth was finally revealed, hubby and I realized we had been hounding the wrong child. We both were certain it was FiFi since she has lied to us in the manner before and never gives herself up. Boy did I feel like crap! It just proved to me that I cannot assume I know the truth. That I must show all my children mercy. Did I mention being a parent is hard?